A Small Navigational Error...Pt 2
by hollywood7301
Summary: Our "Hero" meets Jar-Jar Binks...with the expected results.


Okay…I didn't put a disclaimer into Part One, but hey…this is my first Fanfic, so please bear with me. As we all know, George Lucas is Da Man, and he owns everything in the story except the Piper and John, so mucho props to my man Lucas. "Hey George-you getting around to that DVD stuff yet?"

Rating: "R" John cusses like a sailor.

Read Part 1 first…

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"Heysa…are yousa okeday?" Jar-Jar asked the human sitting on the ground in front of him. Since all of this madness started, Jar-Jar was getting accustomed to the Jedi and the Naboo having strange reactions. But this human's reaction-well, that was the strangest reaction by far.

John had never really put a whole lot of thought into the fact that sentient beings other than the human race might exist. He had never really discounted the existence of UFO's, or Area 51 and Dreamland, but what reading he had done on the "grand conspiracy theories" that existed on the internet had convinced him that the folks that were fervently preaching the coming of the "New World Order" and MJ-12 desperately needed to get laid. As far as he was concerned, he figured that the best sign of extra-terrestrial intelligence was the fact that they had the sense enough to not make contact with mankind.

__

It's really talking to me…this isn't a dream! Kee-rist, it's not a dream…Oh, my God…where in the FUCK AM I? This is really happing…

John's breath came out in long, ragged gasps as he looked up at the Gungan. Qui-gon saw his eyes start to refocus and study the Gungan. The Jedi Master felt a wave in the force from this stranger-confusion, apprehension, curiosity, all flowing so powerful through the force it was like standing next to a fusion reactor and feeling the roar in his chest. This man was force-sensitive, there was no doubt of that-he was broadcasting his emotions so clearly Qui-gon could almost claim them as his own. But he had no control over it-did he even know what the force was?

John looked at…Qui-gon? Was that the man's name? "Sir, what the HELL is going on here? WHERE AM I?" John's voice was low and quiet, but looking at the man's eyes, Qui-gon could tell he was about to explode.

John got unsteadily to his feet. He looked at the two Jedi, the boy, and back at the Gungan. The creature took a step back, and smiled a little uncertainly. 

"I…I…jeez…I…I don't know what the…" John stopped. His legs were weak, and his system was so overloaded with endorphins and adrenaline that his nerves were burning white hot. He didn't even want to think about his stomach. 

__

Well, they're either gonna tell me what's going on, or I'm gonna wake up, or they're gonna kill me. 

Qui-gon could sense that the poor man's mind was being pushed hard-too hard and he was about to start into hysterics. He sent a calming wave through the force to the man.

__

Oh, God, they're not saying shit to me, they are gonna kill me…

Suddenly John felt very relaxed and his racing mind started to slow down. He had felt something like this before, as a boy. John remembered when he was in elementary school; his class had taken a field trip to the city lockup. Aside from the usual comments from the teacher about wanting to leave some of the students there for an "extended stay", John remembered the Pink Cell. The policeman who had shown it to them explained to them that psychology had found that a deep Pink hue surrounding a person calms even the most agitated and violent of inmates. The students were each invited to step into the empty Pink Cell to see if it calmed them down. John remembered the feeling his whole body experienced from being in that cell. It was like a smooth deceleration and relaxation of your whole mind…

John stood there, letting not knowing it was Qui-gon's use of the force that was calming him. He let his mind slow down and his breaths were starting to come easier.

__

Okay…well. I suppose there's got to be an explanation for this. And I don't know why, but they're not dangerous. Something clicked in John's brain. He looked over at Qui-gon._ He did this. Somehow, he did this. He's the one who enabled me to calm down. …But how? …And where am I?_

Another memory surfaced from childhood, one of his grandfather. John remembered that the man could keep his cool under even the most stressful and extreme conditions. _If Pop-pop could keep his cool, then I should at least try to…no. I will._

John turned to Qui-gon. "Thank you," he said, softly. "Where am I? Am I even in the United States? …Or Earth, for that matter?"

Qui-gon paused for a moment. How should he answer that question? "Actually, you're on the planet Naboo. It's in the middle rim."

__

Naboo? Middle rim? …Huh? Oh, man. Well, here goes…

"Well, I guess I need to apologize for how I reacted to you…do you have a name?" John looked, still amazed, at Jar-Jar.

"Meesa Jar-Jar Binks. Isa eesa a Gungan. Yousa never see a Gungan beefo now?" Jar-jar asked, finding it hard to believe that this human had never seen anyone other than his own kind before.

"No, Jar-Jar. I guess you're the first." John looked back at Qui-gon. The man's eyes suggested that he was willing to listen to John, and answer whatever questions he had. "Uh, I don't know how to say this…I'm afraid I'm at a loss for words again."

Qui-gon had been sensing something about this visitor. He couldn't quite place his finger on it, but he had a feeling that if he were to…

"Master." 

Qui-gon looked back at his padawan. Obi-wan's eyes spoke of concern and faint disapproval. He could sense the force-potential of this stranger, and knew what his friend and Master was thinking. "It's alright, padawan. I've got a feeling about him." 

Obi-wan shook his head faintly. First the Gungan. Then the boy. Now this…whoever he was. How many mascots and Chosen Ones and sidekicks were they going to pick up before this mission was over? Qui-gon snapped him out of his thoughts.

"I think this one would take offense at you calling him a 'pathetic life form,' padawan." Qui-gon gently chided him. "See if Captain Panaka has returned yet. Take Anakin and Jar-Jar with you."

Obi-wan nodded. "Come, Anakin. You too, Jar-Jar." 

As they walked off, Qui-gon turned to John. "I imagine you have quite a few questions you'd like answers to. I have a few questions myself." He paused. "John, I'm going to ask you one now. Do you trust me?"

John let out a chuckle. This was getting odder by the minute. "Don't have much of a choice, do I?"

"No…that's not what I was saying," Qui-gon replied. "I'm asking you to trust me because I want to try to help you." When he saw the puzzled look on John's face, he laughed. "I want to answer your questions. I want you to kneel with me."

__

Oh, man. Can I trust him? Not because I have to? But…something tells me I…can trust him.

John knelt down in front of Qui-gon, and both men knelt facing each other, two feet apart. 

"Clear your mind of all thoughts." Qui-gon closed his eyes. "Relax and focus on the moment." 

John closed his eyes, and letting the calm feeling that he had held on to wash through his mind. 

__

What is that?

He questioned what it was, but he knew before he finished asking himself. Qui-gon. It had to be. He knew it as surely as he would recognize a voice, or a smell. He couldn't even describe it to himself, but somehow, he knew Qui-gon was reaching out to him. But before he could start thinking about how it was being accomplished, Qui-gon disappeared.

Qui-gon took a deep breath. This visitor had instinctively thrown up a mental barrier so strong Qui-gon didn't even know if he could get past it if he tried. "John-try to focus your thoughts towards me and the sound of my voice."

John exhaled slowly and focused on clearing his thoughts again. When he did, he felt Qui-gon, more familiar this time, reaching out to him. 

__

What do I do? …Can you even hear me, Qui-gon?

"Yes, I can hear you, John. Keep your mind focused on the moment."

Qui-gon's spoken answer nearly startled John enough to throw up that mental barrier again. But he relaxed again, and called out to Qui-gon again.

__

Qui-gon? Are you still here?

Yes, I'm still here.

*****

"Obi-wan, sir, what are they doing?" Anakin asked. He was watching John and Qui-gon kneeling from a distance, facing each other with their eyes closed, neither man saying a word. They had been like that for almost half an hour.

"They're communicating. Qui-gon thought it best to show him where he is rather than tell him." Obi-wan didn't say that he was concerned that his Master was being a little reckless again.

*****

John's eyes opened, and he wiped a single bead of sweat that was trickling down his forehead. He understood everything-the Trade Federation, the plight of the Naboo, Coruscant, the millenias-old history of the Galactic Republic and the Jedi. Qui-gon had made him aware of everything to the various races of sentient beings that lived in the galaxy to the current state of affairs in the Galactic Senate. Qui-gon had shared with him memories, information, random bits of data in an uninterrupted stream of knowledge and emotion, and John found himself trying to give Qui-gon the history of Earth and where he was from. When the Jedi Master realized that his new friend was trying to communicate back to him, Qui-gon reached deeper into his mind to make the task of telling what he knew of his planet easier.

"So, Qui-gon…I'm guessing that no one back home would THINK a Piper could end up on another planet." John grinned.

Qui-gon chuckled. "No, I suppose not. Come, let's go join the others." He understood the nature of the joke-no wonder John had reacted so strongly at the sight of Jar-Jar. He was composing himself remarkably for a member of a race who had never even been outside of their solar system, let alone made contact with anyone else. As for his plane…intriguing. He'd have to spend some time talking with John about how people on Earth traveled when all of this was over.

*****

Anakin was busy telling John how he had came down over Sebulba during the third lap of the Boonta's Eve pod race when John heard a girl's voice behind him.

"I understand you're new to our planet."

John turned around to see a teenage girl standing a few feet away with Qui-gon and Jar-Jar. _Damn, she's not any older than Liz is…wow, she's gonna be a hottie in a few years…_John caught the smallest of grins from Qui-gon's face, and realized that Qui-gon knew what he was thinking._ Who is she?_

As if to answer his question, the girl stepped forward. "My name is Queen Amidala of the Naboo. Qui-gon tells me that you are…aware of the plight my people are in."

John quickly stood up_. Damn. Here I am, meeting royalty for the first time in my life, and what am I wearing? Jeans, Timberlands, and a Goddamn sweater from the Gap._ "It's a, uh, pleasure to meet you, your highness. My name is John. I sort of ended up here by…I suppose I could say…navigational error. And, yes m'aam, Qui-gon has told me of what has happened here."

The Queen smiled slightly. "That is something Ric Olie would say, I believe. Please…call me Padme. I would like to ask for your help-this is not your fight, but our way of life and our very existence is threatened. We are a peaceful people, and my people are in holding camps because we did not fight then. The time has come for us to stop the Trade Federation, and the odds are against us succeeding. Therefore I ask you if you would help us in this fight to free our peoples."

"Peoples?" John asked.

"Da Gungans bein hurtin too." Jar-jar spoke up. "Da mekaneeks isa all bombad. Dey no care iffn its da Naboo or da Gungans dey be crunchen."

The Queen continued. "We are facing a dark hour, and I am asking a great deal of you. But-"

"Your Highness." John interrupted. _Jesus, did I just cut off a Queen in mid-sentence? Way to go, Johnnie-boy._ "Yes." He breathed deeply. What did he have to lose? It seemed evident that he had a snowball's chance in hell of getting home, and it was obvious that these folks needed any help they could get. John figured he could be of some use-after all, he had grown up around guns and had hunted all his life. "I would be honored to help in any way I can."

"Thank you, John." She turned to Qui-gon. "You were right." With that, she turned and walked back with Anakin to the speeder parked near the edge of the treeline. 

"Should I ask what you were right about?" John asked the Jedi Master as they slowly walked back to the speeder.

Qui-gon put a hand on John's shoulder. "I told the Queen that you had a Jedi's spirit. And that all she had to do for your help was ask."

"Well, I don't know how much help I'll be." John paused. "I'm no soldier…but I do know guns. What kind of weaponry will we be using?"

"Blasters, mostly," the Jedi replied. "Some light artillery, but hand-held weapons for the most part. The Queen has sent out her Captain of Security to locate as many able-bodied troops as possible."

"So…are you and Obi-wan going to carry any kind of blaster, or…" From Qui-gon, John knew about the Jedi's lightsaber, the history of them, how they were employed, but for now, all he had seen of them was an occasional glimpse of the Jedi Master's hanging off his belt.

"No, we'll manage with our lighsabers." Qui-gon replied with a wry grin, noting the surprise coming from his new friend. "I wouldn't worry. We've been in worse situations with them before."

"Hey! They're here!" Anakin's voice called out across the plain to them. "They're here!"

"Come on. Panaka's back." Qui-gon said. "Let's see what the Queen has in mind…"

*****

John was standing around a speeder near the edge of the woods with the two Jedi, Anakin, the Queen, and another Gungan who, while bigger than Jar-Jar, spoke in the same curious accent of Jar-Jar's. The big Gungan had wandered over to Qui-gon and John and introduced himself as Boss Nass, ruler of the Gungans. John wondered how many more heads of state he was going to meet that day.

__

Hell, I'm still waiting for Papa Smurf to stick his happy blue ass out of a tree and say 'Hello'. 

Two minutes later everyone was gathered around the speeder when Panaka came up to give his report.

"What is the situation?" The Queen asked immediately, all business.

  
"Almost everyone's in camps." Panaka replied. John looked at him closer. Panaka was a consumate Captain of the Guard, polished and refined, but he looked like he'd been around the block a couple of times, and could mop up the floor with almost anybody who thought different. He continued. "A few hundred police and guards have formed an underground movement. I brought as many of the leaders as I could. The Federation Army's also much larger than we thought, and much stronger. Your Highness, this is a battle I do not think we can win."

__

What the hell have I volunteered for? John thought. _Are we that screwed?_

"The battle is a diversion." The Queen stated matter-of-factly. "The Gungans must draw the Droid Army away from the cities. Artoo?" She motioned to the little droid standing next to the speeder. The droid projected a holo onto the rear deck of the speeder, showing a tactical map of their entrance route into the palace. She continued. "We can enter the city using the secret passages on the waterfall side. Once we get to the main entrance, Captain Panaka will create a diversion, so that we can enter the palace and capture the Viceroy. Without the Viceroy, they will be lost and confused."

__

Damn. I didn't realize they were teaching tactics and strategy in high school these days. John suppressed a slight grin-he couldn't help it. This girl was standing there, telling a couple of Jedi and a career military man on how they were going to execute an invasion plan. But there she was, doing it. And she looked serious, and competent as hell.

The Queen turned to Qui-gon. "What do you think, Master Jedi?"

"The Viceroy will be well guarded." Qui-gon answered.

Panaka spoke up. "The difficulty's getting into the throne room. Once we're inside, we shouldn't have a problem."

Qui-gon looked over at the leader of the Gungans. "There is a possibility with this diversion many Gungans will be killed."

"Wesa ready to do are-sa part." Boss Nass replied.

__

Jesus, did he just agree to a suicide mission? John looked over at the Gungan. _Well, Johnnie-boy, is it so hard to believe? What do you think dad would have done if the Russians had invaded America? He would have fought, just like these poor brave bastards. Well, all the more reason for me to fight with them. These are their homes…_

The Queen spoke again. "We have a plan which should immobilize the droid Army. We will send what pilots we have to knock out the droid control ship which is orbiting the planet. If we can get past their shields, we can sever communication and their droids will be helpless."

"A well-conceived plan, your highness," Qui-gon interjected. "However, there's great risk. The weapons on your fighters may not penetrate the shields on the control ship." 

"And there's an even bigger danger." Now Obi-wan spoke up. "If the Viceroy escapes, Your Highness, he will return with another droid army." 

The queen looked around. "That is why we must not fail to get to the Viceroy. Everything depends on it."

The queen motioned for John to come over to where she was walking with Captain Panaka. "John, Captain Panaka will arm you and show you how to use our weapons-we'll need you to come with us to the palace."

"Yes, your highness," was all John could manage as a reply.

Panaka pulled out one of his blasters that the Royal guards carried and handed it to John. "Have you ever fired a blaster before?"

John took the weapon and studied it. It seemed to weigh about as much as that big-assed Colt Python .44 mag that his half-crazy uncle was so proud of. The grips of the weapon seemed more contoured to prevent kickback, though. _What it that thing mounted to the bottom of the barrel assembly?_ John fingered the acension gun housing on the blaster. "Well, I've fired .45s and 9millimeters, mostly. Does that count?"

"Forty-fives? What are those?" Panaka had never heard of such a weapon.

John thought about it for a minute before deciding on how to describe a handgun. "Well, it's a hand-held weapon, similar in size and shape to this…blaster, here-and it fires a chemically propelled metal projectile at roughly twice the speed of sound."

Panaka considered this. "Sounds like it would be messy if it hit its target."

"It usually is," John replied. "Can I get a few shots off? You know, to get a feel for the weapon?"

Panaka pointed to a tree away from the group. "Just shoot at the base of the tree." Panaka motioned to the group that a test-firing was about to commence, and there was no cause for alarm.

John adopted a two-handed Weaver stance, and lined up the sights of the blaster on his target, a large knob on the base of a tree twenty-five yards away. _Gentle squeeze…_

THOWAP!

John felt the blaster buck in his hand. _Not as much as kick as a .45…maybe a nine or a .38…_And a flash spewed out of the muzzle. But out of that flash, came a bright green bolt of light. In the blink of an eye, the base of the tree was showering sparks and smoke. When the smoke cleared, John could see that the knob he had aimed for was no longer there-just a charred and smoking patch on the tree.

John turned to Panaka. "Damn." Panaka just grinned slightly.

John turned back around and started picking out targets around the tree he had just shot at. _Damn if this thing isn't cool. _

THOWAP! THOWAP!

A bush was now reduced to smoking embers.

THOWAP! THOWAP!

A rock was blown in half, and then the larger of the two halves were again separated.

John turned around again. Panaka, the Queen, Anakin, Qui-gon and Obi-wan were watching him with interest. _Oh, great…an audience. _He noticed a line of medium-sized rocks about thirty yards off to his right. Panaka motioned for the two guards who were standing near them to move away, and when they did, he looked at John. _Rapid-fire rules apply, Johnny-boy. Two seconds per target…_

THOWAP! The first rock exploded into countless pieces.

THOWAP! The second rock split cleanly in half.

THOWAP! The next one jumped up in the air. THOWAP! The second shot shattered it, sending pieces showering over to the spectators.

THOWAP! This rock skittered across the ground. THOWAP! _Damn, missed it…_ THOWAP! The third shot found its mark and the rock disintegrated.

THOWAP! THOWAP! The last rock, bigger than the others was effectively turned into small pile of gravel with the last two shots. _Double-tap._

As John and Panaka walked back towards the speeders, Obi-wan approached them. "Nice shooting."

"Uh, thanks." John looked at the younger Jedi and smiled. He had been particularly quiet, this guy. John didn't know if the younger of the two Jedi distrusted him, but John couldn't really blame him. _Considering I pretty much dropped outta the sky…_

The Queen looked around at her now re-assembled group.

"Let's go. We haven't much time."

As John climbed into the back of the speeder with Anakin and Obi-wan, he had one thought.

__

Well, Johnnie-boy…are you up for this?

…We'll find out, won't we?

TO BE CONTINUED…

SO…PART 3…HOW DO YOU THINK JOHN'S GONNA REACT TO DARTH MAUL?

__


End file.
